


The Taxi Cab Man

by Rainbowhoodlum



Category: Twenty One Pilots
Genre: Angels, Fluff, Heaven, House of Heroes - Freeform, Kissing, M/M, Songfic, TOPBigBang2019, Taxi Cab, angel!tyler, josh is still in house of heroes, ruby - Freeform, the taxi cab fic, this is sad but cute, twenty one pilots - Freeform, tyler died in a car crash
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-03
Updated: 2019-08-03
Packaged: 2020-07-11 15:34:19
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 15,023
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19930384
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rainbowhoodlum/pseuds/Rainbowhoodlum
Summary: There's an urban legend about a taxi cab that doesn't take you where you want to go, but where you need to go.Tyler is an angel who died when he was 24 with only vague  memories of his previous life. Years later in 2017, he sees a familiar face of someone he knew from long ago; a forgotten friend named Josh.





	The Taxi Cab Man

**Author's Note:**

> We all have different beliefs of what happens after we die. For me, I believe there is a greater place than Earth where everything is gentle and lovely and carefree, but I know I will always miss my life in the world I grew up in. Earth can be a lovely place. It can also be a tragic place. It depends on how we decide to view it; what kind of lenses we use to see it. It can be blurry, sharp, rose-tinted, blue hued, anything really. 
> 
> After watching Good Omens (keep in mind, I was finishing writing this years before Good Omens premiered) it opened my eyes to how even angels can love a world that has so many flaws, because many times it's also a beautiful place.
> 
> This is now available as a book! Message me on Instagram @rainbowhoodlum for more information!

Tyler didn't like clouds.

Clouds cast dark shadows over the earth, covering the beautiful clear skies. That was why Tyler looked up at the night stars instead, but they always became blurs of lights each time he went out to drink in the city. His early concerts were empty most of the time, so on nights like these, he snuck into bars to drink away his troubles. To him, these were the clearest moments he remembered of his life, even when they were as hazy as a cloud fading away by the wind.

He remembered he was standing on the sidewalk of a city street, keys lost, and one arm outstretched to flag down a taxi that could drive him home safely. Maybe that was why his keys were gone. He was swaying pretty heavily on his feet so it definitely wasn't a good idea to drive, so maybe the bartender confiscated his keys. Or maybe he'd been mugged? Tyler scowled at the thought. He could have sworn he called his friends earlier for a lift, or maybe he didn't. Tyler didn't remember. He never remembered anything anymore.

A car had slowed down among the noisy traffic and stopped alongside the cub near him. A pure yellow car, Tyler noticed. He stepped into the backseat and uttered his thanks as he was swathed by a familiar atmosphere. Had he been here before?

"More drinking, Tyler?" The driver asked with a sigh. 

Tyler groaned and slumped down onto the black leather seat in response, and the cab soon rumbled to drive again with its full tank of gas. All the taxis felt familiar now. 

Warm morning light eventually trickled through the window after he cracked open his eyes, a beautiful sight that bathed him in warm golden light before it all went wrong. There was a screeching sound of tires, followed by a sudden jolt that sent him into the air for a split second before his head hit something hard and everything went black. The air was becoming colder as he felt a warm liquid trickling down his forehead; a deafening horn and the sound of sobbing faded away slowly, and Tyler was welcomed by the clouds he disliked so much.

  
  


The majority of his time was spent swathed by them, looking up and down at those white puff balls, even lounging on them, as the winds carried him across the vibrant blue skies. They were safe and comforting, yet he was absolutely sick of them.

"How long am I here for?" Tyler always asked the new people he met, which they always answered with the same voice laced with tranquility and utter sweetness:

"For eternity, Tyler."

Tyler pursed his lips each time, so he resorted to asking the blonde girl named Jenna the same thing, hoping he would get a different response from her. The answer was different in wording, but it held the same exact meaning. "Forever, Tyler dear! Isn't that wonderful?"

"I guess so." Tyler always rasped back as he reached behind his back to tug at one of his feathers. Too wonderful. Too perfect. 

"It was worth it." She went on, gliding her bare feet over the wisps of clouds as they walked together, hands seemingly feeling the softness of the air like a ballerina. "All the hardships we endured was all worth it in the end."

"I liked it better down there." Tyler retorted bluntly as he gestured to the moving earth below them. "At least, I think I did." 

"Don't be silly." Jenna sat down next to his feet once they reached the edge of a cloud. "You know we don't remember much of what life was like back there anyway. No one does. And it's for the best."

"Then what's the point of memories if we only lose them in the end?" 

Jenna just shrugged in response and Tyler bit his lip in annoyance at how ignorant she was. She wasn't bothered at all that she couldn't remember a single friend she once had, similar to Tyler's problem.

One thing he was sure of was that he did have friends, but their faces were all too faded to identify them. However, there was one faded face that continued to stand out above the rest, so whenever Tyler brief yet frequent flashbacks, he always knew that that person had a significance in his life. The idea nagged at his heart. He often remembered that car crash on a Sunday night too. He had only been twenty-four when he died. 

"Can you see all those little people down there Ty?" The blonde's voice woke Tyler from his thoughts, distracting him by completely changing the subject. "They're all crowding to get in that one building with all that music. Do you see? You see them Tyler? Right there." She pointed with her toes, which of course were painted a soft shade of carnation pink. 

Tyler settled beside her in defeat, leaning dangerously far over the edge of the cloud they both sat on. The building she was pointing at looked like some sort of club, and inside, there was a group of people performing on stage. They all looked so ordinary, but there was a drummer who had the brightest shade of yellow mohawk hair that made him stand out above the rest.

He couldn't help but smile as he studied the human. "Look at that one guy. He looks like a lemon." 

Jenna squinted her brilliant blue eyes to see who he was signifying and giggled. "He sure wants attention. Go figure."

"Who does he think he is? The lead singer?" Tyler scoffed as he leaned over the cloud more out of fascination. The sound of the drumming captivated him.

The blonde snickered and leaned back on her hands and outstretched her feet to wriggle her pink toes. "Don't know. Why don't you ask him?"

The color of the man’s hair reminded him of the intensity of the morning sun. The vibrant and unnatural color made his eyes tired, yet lured them in to stare longer. The sound of his drumming mixed with his hair triggered something deep inside of Tyler, but he couldn't figure out exactly what it was. 

Before he was about to make another wisecrack joke about the guy, a gust of wind suddenly blew over the two sitting on the cloud, sending Tyler's red beanie flying off into the sky's abyss.

Without thinking, Tyler shot out his hand to uselessly attempt to snatch what was already long gone when he felt his body becoming the victim of heavy gravity. He heard Jenna gasp behind him, followed by two hands latching onto his wrist and pulling him back up.

"Tyler, you're so stupid!" He barely heard her shout as he stared horrified at where his only colorful possession had disappeared. White seemed like such a sickening color now, so his red beanie and that drummer's yellow hair were all too tempting to jump after. 

He made a move to try and step off the cloud again, but the girl pulled him back.

"Tyler you know what will happen if you fall!" Jenna continued to shout at Tyler who wasn't bothering to look at her. He already knew his risks if he stayed too long on Earth. His wings would soon die and fall off, eventually making it impossible to fly back up and he would become a mere ghost; a soul that only belonged to one place, unseen and forgotten. It had happened to too many fallen angels in the past.

"But I liked it..." Jenna didn't have time to object before Tyler pulled away from her grasp and jumped, plunging to the ground far below them. The deafening sound of the wind rushing against his ears replaced her fading shrieks of shock.

◽ ◽ ◽

His wings caught the air briefly before the force became too much, causing them to bend outward like an umbrella, sending him falling straight into a tree. Branches tangled into some of his feathers as he struggled to tear himself out, dropping clumsily onto the cool grass. The sun was already sinking below the hills and buildings of the city, turning everything a warm, beautiful color.

People nearby heard the commotion and were now staring at the man who had just appeared out of a tree. Tyler managed to stand weakly and look around at his surroundings. It had been five years since he stood on the face of the planet, and now, all eyes were glued to him.

A flash of red suddenly caught his eye from a group of college kids that were walking down the street towards the busier part of the city. One man was wearing Tyler's beanie. He must have found it somewhere on the sidewalk were it dropped from the clouds. 

Tyler quickly rushed up behind the group, and a flap from his wings helped him jump up and snatch the beanie right off of the guy's head before any of them could stop him. A smile rose on his lips as he heard the yells from the people that were now cursing him out as he ran as fast as he could down the streets. It was oddly amusing to hear such unkind voices like that again, so Tyler smiled even more, even though it was evident that a few of his delicate feathers fell off at the action. 

An angel exploring the earth again was a risky affair. Within roughly twenty-four hours on Earth, their wings would begin to deteriorate and detach from their bodies, making them too weak to possibly fly hundreds of miles back up to their home in the clouds. The reason for this was to discourage angels from venturing into the living population and negatively alter the path a living individual. More often than that, angels would fall in love with society all over again and refuse to ever return to the clouds. Their consequence was far worse than being grounded. They would have to wander the Earth for eternity, just as they wished, forever invisible to everyone and be tragically deemed a fallen angel. At that stage, it was impossible to save them. 

Several cars nearly hit Tyler as he wandered aimlessly across a street, the blaring horns were followed by more angry shouts. Were people always this mean? What was the world like when he was still alive?

Tyler slowed to a halt when he spotted the building Jenna had pointed out. It was much more extravagantly detailed than he expected. It was engulfed in colorful neon lights around its perimeter and every time a person walked in there were bursts of lights and heart-vibrating music that escaped its doors. Just like the crowds of smiling and laughing partygoers waiting in line, the building's atmosphere lured Tyler inward. 

He joined the back of the line and thought about the drummer with the hair that was brighter than the sun. He wanted to get a closer look at him. It hurt to force himself to identify him. Maybe he was one of Tyler's friends years back? Maybe not. Tyler didn't remember.

Before he knew it, Tyler was at the front of the hectic line. A man stood in front of him with an earpiece and a tablet. Tyler was about to step around him to get inside when the man shot up his arm to block him. 

"Woa woa bud." The man pushed Tyler back. "What's your name?"

"Tyler Robert Joseph."

The man looked down at his list, tapped the device, and shook his head. "Name's not on the list, bud."

"Okay." He didn't understand what this strange process was or why his name would be on any list anyway, so he made an attempt for the door again. Just a quick look at the drummer and then he'd leave.

The man stopped Tyler again. "I said your name's not on the list, which means you can't come in unless you have a physical ticket.”

He frowned as the man lifted up one of the ropes beside him and harshly made a gesture for him to leave. Tyler obeyed and left the line, sulking over to the side of the building and leaned against the wall. The music was still erupting from inside, shaking Tyler's insides from the morphed vibrations just taunting him. He needed to see that drummer up-close to be sure he was a face Tyler knew from his old life. 

A nearby back door suddenly opened and out strode a security guard who was muttering something incoherent on his radio. Tyler took the opportunity to rush through the shutting door right before it slammed shut behind him. 

He was in, and a few more feathers fell off onto the floor in the semi-darkness. Tyler ignored it and decided to follow the raving lights and the sound of the music, keeping alert in case another guard came. As he took a few quick turns, using his hands to guide him, crowds of mingling people suddenly came into view from an entrance down the hall. 

When he stepped out, Tyler was welcomed through heaven's gate for the second time. An array of assorted colors engulfed him, more vivid than anything he had seen before. The same band was still on stage, who mimicked the crowds wild energy, and the yellow-haired drummer was still benched behind his instruments. His bright hair bounced as he drummed his heart out, and Tyler felt his legs tugging him through the mass of people, keeping his eyes locked on the man, as if losing sight of him might make him disappear.

" _ If you were mine I'd tear the altar down of all that I'd lost to romance. _

_ If you were mine I'd risk my dignity if only to give love a chance! _ "

Tyler had maneuvered and pushed his way to the front of the barricade that kept the excited people from coming any closer to the stage. The lead singer was hogging all the attention near the front, but Tyler's gaze never left the drummer hidden behind the drum set. Slowly, Tyler slid his feet between the bars to lift himself onto the railing, using his wings, invisible to everybody, to balance.

Then, the drummer began singing in a sweeter voice than all the angels Tyler had known. He almost lost his balance when his heart leapt, yet he continued to gawk and stare wide-eyed just as he remembered his friend.

It was Josh. 

" _ If you were mine, I'd have the world _

_ I'd have the world if you were mine. _

_ If you were mine,  _

_ If you were mine _ ―"

"Josh!" Tyler screamed above the music, unable to contain his shock that he remembered who this person was. It was really Josh! He just looked older than last time Tyler had seen him; with a change in hair color and matured muscles.

Tyler's yell had caused Josh to flinch and cut his singing early, breaking one of his drumsticks with an extremely spooked expression that stared into the crowd. The performance continued with nobody noticing his mistake, but Josh went on drumming distractedly as he tried to identify where the voice had come from.

That was the exact reaction Tyler wanted from him. "JOSH!" He screamed again, earning a slap on the wrist by a person beside him. He looked down at the angry person.

"Shut up, will ya!" The heavily accessorized man wearing a pair of pink shutter shades scolded him.

Tyler ignored the guy and looked back up at the stage to see that Josh was now looking straight at him, eyes widened and face growing pale as he stared at his old friend in a red beanie who was eagerly leaning over the barricade. Tyler smiled at him, hoping Josh would stop drumming and rush down to the pit and hug him and tell him he'd missed him so much. But Josh didn't do that.

Instead, he kept drumming, but not as passionate as he had before.

◽ ◽ ◽

Thirty minutes passed before their set ended, and Tyler made sure he was discreet when it came to sneaking around the backstage dressing rooms, desperate to find the drummer he had seen. 

He remembered  _ Josh _ . 

_ Josh. Josh. Josh. Joshua William Dun _ . Tyler chanted the name in his head. He actually remembered someone. 

He remembered his drumming, his smile, his voice, the way he spoke to Tyler, but not their history together. It must have been something related to music since Josh seemed to have made a career of drumming.

"Dude what happened out there?" Tyler suddenly heard a voice complain from a half open door. He stepped closer to hear the annoyed voice better. "It looked like you were about to vomit! Like you saw a person with six fucking heads or something!"

Tyler was standing at the doorway now, peering in to see with excitement that Josh was slouching on a couch like a scolded child as the other man lectured him from an unseen corner. Josh opened his mouth, about to say something smartass to his band mate before he caught sight of Tyler, just standing in the doorway.

Josh's yellow hair was wet from sweat, and Tyler was able to see clearly that the shirtless drummer was breathing heavily. Josh was even more attractive than when he was twenty-four and now he was once again staring at Tyler.

Tyler smiled because this time he really thought the drummer would get up and confront him, but then Josh just closed his eyes and rested his head in his hands. "I'm sorry." He murmured to his band mate. "I think I'm sick or something. It's like I keep seeing a ghost."

Tyler's heart sank.

The door suddenly closed in his face and he heard the exasperated voice of the other man. "You're full of it, Josh."

◽ ◽ ◽

Tyler refused to lose sight of Josh, even though he'd clearly forgotten how to act around people who still lived on earth. And that stalking was in fact  _ creepy _ .

But that didn't stop him from following Josh into local stores or other places. He just had to make sure he was hidden from Josh's paranoid eyes. Tyler wanted to observe just how much the drummer had changed in five years. He remembered Josh, but not exactly how they came to know each other. Only simple music notes or songs on the radio he heard jogged his memory for a second before the spark died and he was left just as clueless as he was before.

Sometimes he even forgot that he didn't want Josh to see him; like when he was in the grocery store when Josh had turned around and dropped ten cans of Red Bull when he saw Tyler standing at the end of the aisle.

Josh frantically left after that, leaving the poor man even more creeped out than before.

A few more days passed when Josh was at Starbucks did Tyler decided he would make a move. It was time. Tyler stood outside, looking through the window and waiting until Josh ordered his coffee before he walked in.

Josh was staring down at his phone while at the pick-up counter, idly typing on it. He looked up when he heard someone approaching him and instantly leapt back when he made eye contact with Tyler. Before Tyler could say a word, Josh was fleeing past him out of the shop.

"Josh! Your coffee is ready. Josh?" A confused barista called after him from the counter, holding up a Venti cup. 

"I can take it to him." Tyler snatched the coffee before the barista could reply and ran out of the shop in pursuit of Josh. 

By the time Tyler pushed his way outside, he looked around frantically, scanning the streets for his drummer. He immediately spotted Josh walking quickly down the street with his head lowered. "Josh!" Tyler shouted after him, which only prompted Josh to walk away faster. "JOSH!" Tyler called again and sprinted until he was close enough to grasp Josh's shoulder.

"Josh you forgot your―" Tyler stopped himself when Josh turned to face him. The drummer's face was twisted in sadness and tears welled from his eyes. Tyler let go of his shoulder. 

"Why can't you just leave me alone?" Josh whispered with a pained smile of some sort. "I'm sorry! I've always been sorry but I can't take this anymore, Tyler!"

Tyler took a step back. After a five year hiatus, this wasn't how he expected Josh to greet him at all. All day, he had been imagining the scenario when he would reunite with Josh: They would spot each other from a distance and gaze at each other and smile and run and collide into a hug so tight they would fall over and laugh for hours about, just melting in each other's arms.

"The coffee you mean?" Tyler asked, "It's still warm."

"No!" Josh shouted, causing Tyler to wince. "You're haunting me for God's sake! I'm seeing you everywhere!"

A smile threatened to rip open Tyler's lips, but he forced himself to keep a solemn face. This was no time to laugh at his choice of words. His friend was clearly agitated at his presence. 

"Please Tyler! Just leave me alone." The drummer used his hoodie sleeve to wipe his face dry, took a deep breath, and turned to walk back down the street. He must have heard Tyler's footsteps timidly shuffling after him, and instantly he countered to face the angel. "Tyler! Go away―" 

Tyler opened the lid of the Starbucks cup and tossed a good amount of semi-hot coffee onto Josh's exposed neck and nice Jon Bellion hoodie, earning a flinch and a short gasp from him. Tyler didn't care. Josh needed to know that this was all real.

Josh stood for a few seconds in shock with his mouth gaped. Eventually, his shoulders slumped in defeat. He snatched the half empty cup away from Tyler and walked over to a bench and sat down. Tyler hesitated a moment before he followed, slowly stepping in front of Josh; his pure soul looming over one still trapped in his temporary vessel.

The drummer sighed. "I must look insane talking to myself right now." Josh muttered, head bowed, his broken spirit staring down at his sticky coffee cup, thinking about the loss of an old friend he couldn't believe was currently in his presence. 

The idea hurt Tyler as he gently kneeled in front of Josh, begging to know if there was a way to comfort him and let him know there was really someone kneeling before him. Maybe spilling hot coffee on him wasn't the best idea. 

"No you don't." Tyler laid a hand on Josh's knee and tilted his head to get a better look at Josh. "You just look like a very, very sad person talking to a stranger."

"A stranger with bird wings."

That made Tyler perk up in bewilderment as he stared at Josh. He thought no one was able to see his wings except for other angels. "You can see my wings?"

"Why do you think I've been so upset about seeing you?" Josh sniffed and wiped his cheek again. His eyes were still full of pain. "I'm going crazy enough to imagine that you’re back from the dead."

Tyler's heart sunk at the misery entwined in Josh's quivering voice. "Well, I'm definitely not imaginary because other people can see me too. You see this beanie? I stole it from a guy's head and ran away while he cursed me out. And I just splashed coffee on you, dude! You can't deny that didn't just happen. Look at yourself! You're a sad and soggy person."

Josh's eyes dragged up to meet Tyler's, and he could see the corners of Josh's lips curl up slightly. "So, you're really here? I'm not dreaming of dead people?" 

Tyler looked down at himself, pinching his white shirt as he studied his own body. "Well, I shouldn't be here. That's for sure."

"I went to your funeral. I know you're gone. You're just a ghost." 

"I don't like that word." Tyler stood up and joined Josh on the bench. "And clouds. I don't like clouds. I see too much of them up there." Tyler pointed to the afternoon sky. "I prefer “a soul with wings that is no longer exposed to the elements or held captive in a vessel of their former body that can once again talk to other deceased souls and old friends."

A new pretty sound came from the drummer next to him, a type of laugh that was a foreign mix of pure amusement and longing affection that had been lost and found again after all these years. Tyler decided he liked this new sound, ranking in at #2 after Josh's singing he missed hearing already. The drummer seemed a little relieved, maybe even happy. "So, an angel then?"

Tyler snapped his fingers at that, followed by a bright smile directed towards his yellow-haired friend, a gesture that immediately cleaned the coffee stain from Josh's hoodie. He didn't like using his abilities a lot, but for Josh, there was an exception. "There! That's the right word."

The action absolutely amazed Josh as he looked down at his once again dry and stain-free hoodie. As Tyler found himself staring admiringly at him again, Josh's hand lightly touched his forearm for a second, then pulled away quickly. He was testing for himself who he saw was in fact a physical being, but who was also dead―no. An  _ angel _ .

Tyler's bare skin of his arm shivered at the touch of his old friend. Josh looked even more lovely than he remembered, so he needed to remember more. 

"You still look young." Josh suddenly broke the silence that Tyler didn't even notice had developed between them.

Tyler smiled, reluctantly revealing his crooked teeth. "I'm still twenty-four."

"And still handsome as ever. You're saying “fuck you” to time."

Tyler felt his face heat up and he shifted shyly, laughing a bit as a thank you. Was he more than just friends with Josh? His friend had this glow to his eyes like the setting sun, and Tyler himself felt an odd luring attraction toward him.

"Why did you come?" Josh ventured, meaning no offence but out of pure curiosity. It had been five years since they last saw each other, and to Tyler's dismay he couldn't remember all that he should have about him. No wonder Josh was so full of anxiety at the shock of seeing an angel of his dead friend. Or possibly more than friends..? He didn't know for sure.

"I know we haven't talked in quite some time," Tyler played with what he thought were his own hand, but in fact it was Josh's hand that he had unknowingly taken hold of. "But I saw you drumming a few nights ago and you just seemed so familiar." He swallowed and held Josh's hands tighter. "When someone dies, they don't remember fully of what their life was like. I guess I just needed something to recognize."

"D-do you remember the crash?" 

Tyler winced, nodding slowly at the memory of slamming through a layer of windshield glass, and then he was gone as quickly as it occurred. "That's the only thing I've always remembered."

Josh swallowed, suddenly finding it difficult to meet the other's eyes since his own were welling up with tears. "Was it quick?"

"Very."

The drummer bit his lip and looked down, clearly distressed. "I wasn't there that night because I had to work. I thought Nick would be with you after the show."

"Who was Nick?"

His friend showed even more of his concern in his expression. "Your guitarist. And Chris was your drummer before me."

"In our band?" Tyler scrunched his eyebrows, things coming to him slowly as he thought more of Josh performing on stage. There were faints sounds of piano notes and ukulele strings fused with the percussions of drums. That's right! He must have played the piano and ukulele beside Josh!

"Yeah. You named it  _ twenty one pilots _ ." Josh smiled, his eyes gazing at the distant past. "After a line in a play by Arthur Miller. Twenty-one pilots died by the fault of just one man."

Josh had become so captivated over a band Tyler could barely remember being involved in. "So what happened? Where was Nick?"

"Wherever the hell he was, he was supposed to take you home after you had a few drinks at a bar like you usually did after every show. You took a taxi instead, and..." Josh took a breath. "There was an accident. Investigators told us that the driver swerved for some reason, and you crashed."

Tyler listened intently.

"You were going through a lot of things back then." Josh paused like he was envisioning a movie scene of young Tyler sitting alone at a bar. "You cared so deeply about where the band was heading that you blamed yourself for how engaged the crowds were. You came up with so many different ideas of what you could add to the shows, like wearing masks or doing drum battles. It took a huge toll on you." He paused again, this time rasping, "I should have been there for you."

"On that night?"

He looked at Josh for confirmation, but the glassiness in Josh's eyes explained it all. Josh nodded. "Yeah."

Things pieced together one by one. He felt sympathy for Josh having to endure so much guilt and sadness as he went on thinking he could have done something more to prevent the events that had occurred, but it was something Josh had no ability to control. His bandmates were not present in his last hours, and by the end of that night, Tyler had to take that unreliable taxi drive that would lead him to his life's end. 

"I'm sorry." Josh rasped.

"Don't say that, Josh." All Tyler wanted to do was comfort Josh and somehow saved him from how he felt. "It wasn't your fault."

Josh still looked unsure and he swallowed hard. "What about before all that?"

"Before what?" Tyler looked at him. 

"Like," Josh squeezed Tyler's hand. "What our plans were for the future...?"

Tyler looked at him a moment longer before he shook his head sadly. "No. Nothing clear enough to see."

Sadness, and even a hint of anguish developed in Josh's eyes. It made Tyler feel like he had just involuntarily ripped the drummer's heart out and threw it onto the concrete to spit on after grinding it down in the dust with his foot.

"Let me take you to some places," Josh suddenly offered with a new spark of hope. "Around the city! Maybe it can jog some old memories."

Tyler smiled, not caring anymore if Josh saw or remembered how crooked his teeth were. "Alright, Drummer Boy. Lead the way."

◽ ◽ ◽

The first place he took Tyler was Guitar Center. As soon as they walked through the doors, Josh led him down the aisle stacked with varieties of different keyboards. He pointed at a few and looked at Tyler for approval, but Tyler just shook his head at each one. His friend gave him a peeved face, grabbed a random keyboard, and pulled him over to a drum set in the corner of the room. Tyler stared blankly at the black and white keys of the device Josh had dropped into his hands before settling into the seat behind the drums. He looked at his friend expectantly. 

Tyler hesitantly pressed one key producing a single annoying tune, but nothing came to his head. As an unspoken queue, Josh began to drum a steady beat that gradually made both their heads bob. He couldn't help but smile as he watched Josh fall into a mesmerizing rhythm, drumming a pattern he knew by heart.

"Anything coming back?" Josh hummed. "Anything—," he hit the cymbals, "Familiar?"

Tyler smashed a bunch of random keys at once like a child experimenting with music, humming back, "NooOO!"

Josh closed his eyes and lifted his head as he drummed, and a smile grew on his face as if he was recollecting something from the distant past. "Sometimes you'd wake up in the middle of the night with a melody in your head. You'd rush to record it before you forgot. If you did, you'd stare for hours at nothing at all trying to find it again." His eyes cracked open and his drumming slowed. "There were so many ones lost. Think about how perfect they all could have been if humans didn't have the ability to forget." Josh suddenly stopped. 

Forgetting was one of the worst flaws a human processed, whether their memories had been good or bad. People would live through that moment in time on Earth, and if that moment wasn't memorable enough, they'd forget it like it was never important in the course of their life's journey. Even angels bore this flaw. It was sickening.

"Why did God make humans forget?" 

All Tyler could do was stare at Josh. He didn't have the answer of course, but it was a question worth considering. 

The drummer looked at Tyler curiously. "Are you able to ask Him that?"

"It's not my question to ask."

Josh broke his gaze and stared at nothing in particular, just like Tyler had done regularly; trying to find the answer for himself but failing to dig deep enough at the very core of his repressed memories, losing the gold every single dive. It made Tyler long for the answer as well. 

He looked down at the small keyboard he held. It was an instrument he couldn't even remember how to play which deemed it completely worthless. "I can't remember anything, Josh. Nothing's coming to me."

Josh was obviously crestfallen as he set his drumsticks down in defeat. "That's alright. I shouldn't have pushed it." He stared down at his hands before perking up. "Don't worry, Ty. We got plenty of time. Come on."

Before Tyler could object, Josh was pulling him off the floor and out of the shop. He needed to explain that his wings could only stay alive for so long in the atmosphere of the earth before they withered away and died. Time was one of the many things he didn't have enough of, and Josh needed to understand that.

◽ ◽ ◽

For not knowing much about his life, reliving it the entire day in his hometown proved to be better than a thousand years in the clouds. Within a few hours of talking and sightseeing, he knew more about Josh than any of the angels, more than Jenna even. Likewise, Josh was treating the day like the millionth first date between them. From Guitar Center, they toured Columbus and tried famous local foods from almost every voguish restaurant within close distance, including overhyped cafés, sushi places, and their beloved Hounddog's Pizza. Just when Tyler assumed the day would wrap up, they opted for a two hour drive to the beach. Not the most convenient location to tour on such short notice, but the best possible place for a day trip nonetheless. 

Small waves crashed over Tyler's bare feet and ankles. It was a good thing they both rolled up their jeans before they dashed like kids into the freezing water, but it proved to be pointless when they started kicking water onto each other and evoked a game of tag. It eventually had them staggering and falling into the water, soaking themselves completely which induced even more laughter between them. 

Josh tugged Tyler along the shoreline, swinging their arms together with a bottle of mountain dew in their other hands. Josh looked so much happier in the light of sunset that brightly cascaded over the water, warming his soaked hoodie and glowing his hair gold. They were finally at peace with their emotions, and possibly even their past. 

"Do you remember coming here?" Josh asked him after a while of just exchanging smiles and laughs as they walked through the ripples of waves.

Tyler shook his head. "Not really. But it's beautiful." 

The sun's yellow hue was disappearing slowly beneath the distant expanse of water, dragging orange and pink clouds down into its grave. Tyler imagined the angels taking shelter in thin air before morphing into the billions of stars seen in the night sky. The sun would rise the next day, and they would return to sit on the cotton clouds that would travel over their former home.

"We visited so many places whenever we could. The beach, movies, local fairs, parties, family gatherings. I remember this one summer we drove your car to Hollywood and spent a week along the coast for my birthday. We barely had any money so we had to sleep in the back seat." Josh was beaming. "Other times you would call out of nowhere and say we're going to the beach with our bikes. I took you to tons of my friend's pool parties and every new movie that came out in theaters, and even our family BBQs. I don't think anyone believed us when we told them we were..." He suddenly cut himself off, stopping Tyler from envisioning everything he was lucidly describing. 

"What?" Tyler looked at him expectantly, but Josh was hesitant to finish. He stopped walking and tugged Josh to a halt. "What were we, Josh?"

Josh stayed silent for a moment, looking at the soda bottle in his right hand, then at his left hand Tyler was holding. In the softest voice he mustered to say, "We were engaged."

Now Tyler knew for sure he had thrown Josh's heart onto the ground and spat upon it. His blood ran cold at the thought of being with Josh romantically rather than what he presumed to just be an incredibly close-knit friendship established possibly since their childhood. Even envisioning them simply kissing or sleeping together made his head spin, but dreams like that disappeared for Josh that Sunday night. 

"Engaged." Tyler repeated.

Josh looked at him warily as if muttering the word caused a gun to click, aiming right for their heads. He remained cautious of his words as if he didn't know how Tyler would react. He went on. "We kept it low-key for a while since we didn't how Nick would feel about it. I'm pretty sure he knew though. In the end."

"He never seemed thrilled about you joining the band in the first place, did he?" Tyler guessed. 

"No, he wasn't." Josh smiled a little. "You remember that?"

"It's starting to come back. It's because you replaced Chris so quickly?"

"It's because he assumed you had been thinking of getting a new drummer for months, even before Chris decided to leave."

Tyler looked at the water, not knowing what to say or how he was supposed to react to this information. Was he supposed to be happy that they were together? Or mad that Josh hadn't told him sooner? Or maybe he was supposed to be sad that he didn't even remember he loved Josh. 

He remembered Nick's dumb emotions from when they were bandmates, but not anything about love between him and his partner. It made him feel sick inside. It was a horrible feeling.

"Tyler? You okay?" Josh asked.

"I'm sorry I can barely remember anything."

"What are you talking about? You've remembered so much today! Heck, you're the one who recognized me in the first place and stalked me for three days straight!"

Tyler scoffed. "So that's a good thing, huh? Nevermind a concussion from a 25,000 foot fall. If stealing hats, sneaking into nightclubs, stalking a friend and later pouring hot coffee on them leads to good things, I'm still considered a saint."

"How can an angel get a concussion? Did I miss something?"

Tyler shoved him, causing Josh to cackle, his tongue protruding from his teeth and eyes crinkling shut. He loved watching his friend, his once future  _ husband _ , when he looked so carefree with no pointless worries cluttering his anxious mind.

"Look, if you want to try to remember more, we can go back to our apartment. Maybe go through some old photos, or just relax and watch a movie." Josh suggested. 

Maybe Josh was right. What he really needed to do was just take it slow with recovering his memories, and just continue to enjoy his time back on Earth. Eventually, and hopefully, they would all come back when the time was right. Tyler smiled. "That sounds okay."

◽ ◽ ◽

Night had fallen by the time they left the bay area to drive the long trip back. Tyler fell in and out of sleep as the car motion lulled him, but he was eager to see the lit city they passed in the darkness at 70 miles per hour. 

Josh lived in an upscale apartment complex in the heart of Columbus. No matter how achingly familiar everything seemed as pulled into the parking lot, as if experienced in a long forgotten dream, Tyler couldn't clearly recall stepping foot here. Figuratively, it would be on the tip of his tongue.

"This is nice." Tyler said while trying to observe as much of the scenery as he could before Josh led him up the outside steps to the second story. He never let go of Tyler's hand on the whole walk there and refused to lose contact with him at all. However, he couldn't tell exactly what Josh was currently feeling, which bothered him because Josh's emotions were constantly a jumbled mess within the hours they reunited with each other. His lighthearted mood contradicted with the somber mask he wore, and that sometimes changed to a somber mood paired with a lighthearted mask. They came in waves, tides changing like night and day.

When they finally entered the apartment to escape the cold night air, Tyler was welcomed by a waft of warm scents mingled with sweet burned out candles, shampoo drifting from the bathroom, new furniture, and what must have been leftover delivery pizza in the kitchen from the night before. He desperately hoped the smells would trigger some recovered memories of what he and Josh's life was like five years ago in 2012, but he found them to be just as foreign as the other things he saw today.

"What do you think?" Tyler returned his attention back to Josh who was looking at him expectantly in the doorway. His friend bit his lip again. "You practically lived here with me before we hit the road for tour."

"Tours?" 

Each reply like that was like shooting Josh in the leg until the pain of it would finally take him down, but it hadn't yet. Though he swayed a bit, Josh stood grounded like the strong person Tyler knew he was. 

"Yeah we had this list of places we were scheduled to perform at. We talked about you moving in, but it came too close to the day of the first show that we decided to do that later. We had to pack all our equipment in this crappy van Nick was nice enough to lend us."

"So what did we do before touring? What happened to Nick and Chris?"

"Before I joined, Chris had left the band to focus on work, so when I met you it was absolutely perfect to fill that open drummer's position. We were a three-man band for a few weeks, but then Nick left too to focus on school. The two of us still played a bunch of shows at small local venues who were more than welcoming to us." 

Tyler looked around once more. Almost every square inch of wall was decorated in Polaroids and other photographs of their friends and family, and even some from concerts. It was like a museum about a person in history Tyler didn't have any knowledge of, and so these framed pictures were the only sources of insight into their life. His fellow tour guide would tell him a brief history of events, and then he would have to believe it because he knew nothing more. 

"Tyler?"

Tyler realized he had been staring at one of the walls in a trance until Josh shook his shoulder to wake him. "Hey? Are you okay?"

"I'm fine." 

Josh looked at the wall Tyler was staring at. The majority of the photos were concert pictures; bright multicolored lights bursting from an expanse of darkness, with waves of hands decorating the bottom portions. He could almost hear the music rumbling from each and every photo. Josh pointed at one. "That's you right there."

Slowly, Tyler focused on the figure in the photograph. It was taken from the back of a small moshpit in a dingy basement venue. On stage, three men were performing, but only one man's face was recognizable from the distance. He was standing atop a wooden piano in front of a black backdrop, lips curling back as he screamed into a microphone. Tyler had almost forgotten what he looked like. "That can't be me."

Josh was staring at the photo himself, as if lost in the day it was taken. "Time is weird isn't it?" 

"It's like the only way to stop time is to..." Tyler paused. "...to die."

His friend didn't respond. He was too lost in the past the photo told, back in the days when Tyler remembered who he was. This man indeed was not the same man that stood beside Josh now. Even though he was the same age and bore the same appearance, 2012 Tyler was long dead. Only his angelic spirit, the same mind that was captive in a human vessel for twenty-four years, remained. Josh too, was not the same man. Tyler's death had changed his outlook on life, of how precious each moment is, and how one moment can change the future completely. It made Josh cautious of his actions, unsure of his existence, and rethink his purpose, as if his timeline was a delicate thread that could be broken at any mistake. 

Tyler felt a jolt in his chest. He stepped back from the photo and took a slow breath in. 

Josh noticed this and began to panic. "If this is too much for you, we don't need to look at photographs. We can, uh..." He looked around the room, to the TV. "I have an Xbox. We can play Fortnite. D-do you know what Fortnite is? Or would you want to play Mario Kart instead? Or we can-"

The room started to sway as Tyler tried to blink away the sudden blurriness caught in his eyes. It was like his body was in the middle of glitching but it couldn't overcome the error. Before he knew it, he collapsed against the wall with a thud, rattling all the hanging picture frames. Fortunately, his wings softened his fall. 

"Tyler!" Josh was instantly at his side to help him off the floor and practically carry him to the couch. "Here, sit down."

Tyler was still dazed from the fall. What just happened to him? There was no warning his body gave him before deciding,  _ "Hey I'm going to go ahead and fail on you real quick." _

"Are you okay?" Josh's voice broke into his mind. His friend was situated on the carpet at his feet with his hand cautiously resting on Tyler's knee. He was looking up at him anxiously with nervous energy radiating off him in waves, pulling Tyler in like a rip current. 

Tyler broke his gaze and looked over the armrest of the couch. Several of his white feathers lay strewn in the spot where he had fallen, telling him that he was running out of time. His body, or spirit, must have suddenly weakened as a side-effect of his prolonged time on Earth. 

He felt Josh's hands leave his knees as he stood up, and instantly Tyler wanted nothing but to feel the warmth of his skin through his clothing again. Josh returned a moment later to sit beside him, offering a glass of water. Tyler outstretched his neck to take a sip from it; it was chilled like the wind that blew in the sky and wet like the rain that fell occasionally from the clouds when angels would be sad. It was a rare occurrence when he would taste rain. He pulled away when he realized the entire cup had run empty. He gulped. "Thank you." 

Josh stared at the empty cup that took Tyler only a few seconds to chug down completely before setting it down on the coffee table. "I can't say I know what it's like to be back on Earth after five years, but I'm guessing it's very overwhelming for you." He paused. "I'm so sorry I tried to force you this whole day to remember your entire life. It wasn't fair to you."

"You weren't forcing me. Everything we did today helped me remember what I needed to remember."

Josh took hold of both Tyler's hands. "Tyler, I'm going to do whatever it takes to give you the life you should have lived. We'll move to the west coast, start new, and if you want to, you can start performing again! And this time I'll be right beside you for all of it."

"Josh," The ache in Tyler's heart worsened. "You know I'm still dead."

"But you're here now! I can see and touch you because there's still a way your spirit is manifesting into something physical. You're basically still alive!"

"It's different Josh. I'm only visible to strangers, besides you. I'm assuming since I came, or fell, with the intention of communicating with only you, it grants you the ability to see me."

"So, not even our families could see you?"

"I don't want to find out. If they can, it would be too painful to say goodbye to everyone."

Josh loosened his grip a little. "It was more painful for us when there wasn't even a first goodbye."

His remark made Tyler's heart stop, and suddenly a wave of anger overcame him. "Are you really blaming me for dying?" Immediately after snapping, he realized how awful he just have sounded. He hadn't felt a pang of anger like that for a very long time. Being an angel in the clouds meant there was really nothing to get angry about. Everyone was blissfully content. He didn't mean to sound so harsh, but Josh's comment really upset him. He would have given anything to have things turn out differently, but there was nothing he could change at this point. 

"No no, I wasn't. It's just.." Josh stammered, realizing his tone had been inappropriate. "I shouldn't have said that."

Tyler leaned into the couch and laid his head back. "I know you're just trying to make things right again." He could feel Josh's gaze on him as he looked at the ceiling. "But we can't change things that already happened, and we have to learn to accept that."

Josh lowered his eyes. "I know."

They fell quiet, unsure of what to do or say after such a somber mood was made. He guessed Josh had been looking at the cluster of photos next to him, because in the next moment he was peering over to eye the feathers that scattered the floor where Tyler had fallen. He looked bewildered at how such a minor action could have caused so many to fall off. It looked almost like a bird was caught and struggled for its life on that very spot. He reached out as he attempted to inspect Tyler's back. "What's wrong with your wings?"

Tyler folded his wings tighter behind his back. "It's nothing. It's just," He looked over his shoulder self-consciously. His wings were no longer the pearly white he remembered. They had developed a hue of dusty grey as if life was slowly draining from them. He sank deeper into the couch. "I need to go back soon. I don't have much time left."

"Y-you're leaving?" Josh stammered. 

"I can't stay here. I've fallen. If my wings completely decay when I'm on Earth, I won't have enough strength to fly to the clouds again."

Before Josh could object any further or become even more solemn, Tyler tried to sound eager and not fearful of time. "I'll stay for a few more hours." He murmured. "Was there anything else you wanted to show me?"

After a moment of thought, Josh arose from the couch and walked over to a corner beside the TV. There, he reached to pick up something that produced a tune at contact, and Tyler immediately knew what it was. "Did I ever tell you I learned how to play the ukulele?"

"No.." Tyler tried to contain his excitement as he studied the sand-colored instrument that bore a striking resemblance to the old dark wood ukulele he once owned. "You did not."

"I did. It took my mind off...well, you know." Josh hugged the small ukulele close to his chest and strummed a few off-tune cords before adjusting them as best he could. "Drumming didn't seem like enough. I wanted to try something new. I only learned one song though." He looked up and smiled. "Take a wild guess what it is."

"I don't know.” Tyler pretended to think hard. “Riptide?"

"Nope."

"Soul Sister?"

"No Tyler."

"Over the Rainbow?"

"Tyler."

"If it's the song I'm thinking of, I'm ready for you to serenade me." Tyler responded cockily, smirking. 

Josh swayed a bit on his feet while his cheeks pinkened in a blush. He smiled down at the precious ukulele, tested a few strings, then began shakily strumming the opening to Can't Help Falling in Love. 

" _ Wise men say only fools rush in. But I can't help falling in love with you _ ," 

Josh's quiet voice filling the room was even more celestial than his vocals that were lost in that night club's sea of chaotic noises. Here, he was heard clearly and perfectly, and Tyler could only hope that his neighbors could hear his voice echoing through the walls.

" _ Shall I stay? Would it be a sin, if I can't help falling in love with you? _ " Josh roamed the living room, focusing on the placement of his fingers, yet there were a few times he was able to catch Tyler's eyes before he had to return his attention back to the strings.  _ "Like a river flows, surely to the sea. Darling so it goes, some things were meant to be, _ " He looked up, a huge smile lighting up his face. " _ Take my hand, take my whole life too. Cause I can't help falling in love with you _ ."

Tyler stilled, captivated and hypnotized by the person in front of him who had learned to play the ukulele and was now singing one of his favorite songs. Spending the day alongside Josh made it feel like he had never left the Earth, that he never died, and he was alive as ever. The spirit of his heart swelled, filling the void he never noticed existed. 

" _ Like a river flows surely to the sea, Darling so it goes, some things are meant to be _ ," 

During this time, Tyler had risen from the couch and gradually stepped closer to Josh, swaying briefly with his movements as he continued to hum softly. " _ Take my hand, take my whole life too. Cause I can't help falling in love with you _ ."

Inch by inch, they gravitated closer until he could feel the strumming of Josh's hand against the fabric of his shirt. Tyler was close enough to study every feature of his face as he concentrated on his fingers, and eventually the drummer was able to look up and stare back at him. Gently, he placed his hands on Josh's elbows, ready to support him if he suddenly became weak. 

" _ Cause I can't help falling in love with you _ ."

Their foreheads touched, and Tyler swore he could feel Josh's entire body grow warm. He didn't know love could be manifested into something that hung heavy in the air, but it did, and the source of it emitted from Josh in all its pureness. It spread to Tyler, penetrating his veins, his bloodstream, his very spirit, and his own heart began to pound so strongly. Their noses brushed to test the waters of the other, tenderly, slowly, connecting their lips together.

They only dragged their lips slightly before slowly parting away. It was a simple kiss, but it was all they wanted, because in the next moment they fell into each other's arms, desperately wanting to cling to the person they had lost for five aching years. 

Tyler gripped the fabric of Josh's hoodie. "I've missed you so much you can't even imagine." 

"I can't lose you again, Tyler." Josh murmured against his neck. 

"You never lost me." He wanted to part so he could look into Josh's doubtful eyes to comfort him, but he couldn't allow his body to move away. "I may have forgotten the majority of my life, but I was always there in the clouds looking at people like you. I was always watching you, I just didn't know who you were." He took a shaky breath. "I promise things will get better."

He could feel Josh shutter before craning his head to kiss Tyler's forehead, lips lingering a moment as tears glided down his cheeks onto Tyler's skin. He melted into his touch for a moment before shifting so he could kiss the corner of the drummer's mouth.

Josh resisted. "Wait hold on-" he quickly set down the ukulele against the table. "Okay n-" 

Tyler grabbed his collar, practically dragging them both backwards in order for Josh to pin him against the wall despite the existence of his wings, which thudded loudly against the photo frames. It left Josh stunned, yet it prompted them both to intensity their movements. 

As they deepened their kiss, Josh lifted one of Tyler's legs to rest on his hip, and instantly the angel jumped to wrap both legs around Josh's waist. Tyler began to grind sloppily and Josh pressed him harder against the wall until he could hear his wings briefly thrash for balance. 

"You want to go to the bedroom?" Josh jokingly breathed, clearly winded at this point compared to the amount of energy Tyler was emitting. 

Tyler nodded eagerly. "Yeah sure." he situated himself onto Josh better as the drummer slightly staggered, caught his balance, and carried the angel down the hall. He rested his head on Josh's shoulder, clinging to him like he clung to his father as a child after a long day at the fair, or the beach, or the movies, gently bobbing him to sleep until he would wake back in the comfort of home, all within a few seconds. 

He remembered that. 

As soon as they stepped into the bedroom, Josh set Tyler down on top of the dresser, their bodies still compressed together but could now articulate better motions. Their arms wrapped tightly around the other, and Josh began to mouth at the angel's collarbone, slowly working his way up his neck to his earlobes that caused Tyler to moan quietly. He was afraid the neighbors could hear them, or the higher-ups he dared not speak of. 

Tyler let his eyes blur as he lost himself in Josh's rhythmic kissing that were sure to leave bruises by morning. He combed his hands through Josh's hair of gold as he let Josh’s hands roam his entire body. Tyler closed his eyes to slits, only barely processing what he saw in the room. There was a tall mirror leaning against the corner against the wall across from them, reflecting another world he could never touch. But there was something off about the reflection. Tyler opened his eyes wider. It depicted Josh, with his yellow hair and white hoodie, leaning against the dresser, but something was still missing. 

It was him. He was missing from the reflection. Josh was latching onto thin air as if he was the only man in the room. Tyler stilled, horrified by the sight, yet he remembered he was basically a ghost without a vessel to process. That meant that was invisible in mirrors and cameras, yet visible to the naked eye.

Josh had noticed Tyler stopped reacting and followed his gaze to the mirror as well, looking almost as shocked as his partner. He quickly composed himself and touched Tyler's cheek, dragging his gaze away from the mirror. He gently held Tyler's face, feeling every inch of his cheeks against his fingertips, the sensation of skin against skin. "You're here. You are." he reassured. 

Tyler's heart swelled, placing his hands on Josh's. "I am."

They pulled each other in, touching their mouths against the other's jawline, and dragged their lips together more hungrily.

Their breathing came in gasps. They let themselves go. Up to the ceiling. Up to the clouds. So high up until their souls could leave the atmosphere.

◽ ◽ ◽

The air in the room was heavy with warm breathes.

Tyler was laying on top of Josh, not minding the sweat between their compressed chests at all. He never felt more safe in the arms of anyone else, no other angel, than Josh. Even though Josh didn't possess a pair of wings sprouting from his shoulder blades, Tyler swore it was another angel who had his arms wrapped around Tyler securely.

"Tyler, what are the clouds like?" Josh suddenly breathed into his ear. "Tell me why you don't like them."

Tyler just wanted to keep the comfortable silence between them, with no need to utter a word, but he thought for a moment longer before answering with his voice laced with sleep. "They're way too plain and soft and warm when the sunlight hits them. I got so bored once I ate one and it tasted like cotton candy and powdered sugar." He made a sound of disgust.

Josh giggled, his chest rattling Tyler's whole body. "That sounds great." 

"You wouldn't like it."

"I would love it even more if I'm there with you."

"You can't mean that. Earth is the only good place in the universe. You should never want to leave it."

Josh looked up at the ceiling, as if the walls had turned to aqua blue skies dabbed with creamy whisks of clouds, turned gold by the sun that was dying millions of miles away. Beyond these skies were starry places too beautiful beyond human comprehension, and too far for any living thing to ever reach within an arm's length. 

◽ ◽ ◽

Sunlight pierced through the window blinds strongly enough to awake Tyler. By the warmth of it, it must have been nearing noon. He lifted his face off Josh's bare chest and sat up to look around the room. Clothes were thrown on the floor, the sheets were a mess with feathers and body fluids, and Josh lay with his mouth agape and hair disheveled while it stuck to the pillow. He occasionally let out faint noises that were too soft to be considered snores. Tyler's heart melted at the sight and all he wanted to do was stare at him and his beautiful body forever. 

There was a rumble that suddenly filled the quiet room. Initially it startled Tyler, until he heard the faint growl come from Josh's stomach. Along with almost every important memory of his life, he had also forgotten the basic details that humans needed food to survive, not just because it tasted good.

Slowly and carefully so he wouldn't wake him, Tyler maneuvered off of Josh to steady himself on weak legs. He avoided stepping on any article of clothing as he cracked open the bedroom door and made his way out into the world of Josh's sweet-smelling apartment that hummed with the noise of the air conditioner. 

He entered the kitchen, opened the fridge, and tried to remember what he used to eat for breakfast. On most days, it would be cereal or oatmeal. On great days, it would be French Toast or pancakes, scrambled eggs, bacon, and any fruit available. He looked for any of those ingredients in the fridge, but there was barely any food in it to make a good simple meal for any time of day. The milk gallon was down to its last tablespoon. 

He shut the fridge, mildly irritated, and turned to catch sight of a key rack mounted near the living room door. Under it was a shallow bowl that held some loose coins and Josh's wallet. If he took either of these items out of context and left quietly and never returned, it would sound really bad. But since he had the intention of returning within the hour with bags of quality food to make a proper surprise breakfast for Josh, it now sounded perfectly fine. 

Among the standard keys that were hanging with Josh's Subaru, there was another fob hidden behind a few sets. Tyler reached for it and could just barely decipher a faded Lexus logo. Attached to it was a second key. 

Tyler stared at it for a moment longer before pulling it off the hook, took Josh's wallet, and quietly left the apartment. 

He had to adjust his eyes to the brightness of the late morning. As he descended the stairs, he surveyed the cars parked in the apartment complex. Realizing the fob had a car alarm, he pressed it and listened. A muffled alarm pattern started, but it was coming from around the corner. 

Tyler made his way across the parking lot, rounding the building corner to see a long line of private garages. The car alarm was still sounding from inside of them. He walked by each garage until he was able to narrow his search down to one door. After silencing the alarm on the fob, Tyler picked the second key that had been attached to the ring and knelt down to see if it fit into the rusty paddle lock. Sure enough, there was a clink and the lock popped open. 

Something inside Tyler glitched again. He stopped, expecting his body to fail and drop to the ground once again. He looked at the garage door. This didn't seem right anymore. The lock was rusty as if it hadn't been touched for years, and the car fob had been hung behind other keys as if it was obsolete. He also couldn't ignore the strange aura coming from inside the garage, as it was far from a pleasant feeling. 

When nothing ailed his body, he carefully removed the lock. Using all his strength, he lifted the door open until the sun rays cut through the darkness and spilled over a weathered gray car cover. Golden dust particles flew in the air as the sun streamed in, falling onto a clutter of boxes in the back where a few papers were stacked. 

Tyler walked around the car to get a better look at the papers. It was a few auto report forms and some old newspapers that had browned from age. He picked up the reports, but couldn't really understand the lingo or the handwriting. They were dated back from 2012 and 2013, as well as the newspapers. He picked up one stack, and after reading the headline his heart stopped. 

He read it over again, reading each word slowly until he felt his body coming into a glitch again. He was reading it correctly. The muscles in his arms and legs weakened, but this time he was able to cling onto the fabric of the car and haul himself up before he completely collapsed. He couldn't breathe properly anymore, and his heart was beating faster than he thought was possible. 

Struggling to stay on his feet, Tyler staggered against the car to its hood. He feared what he was about to do, but he needed to be sure. He lifted the rim of the car cover and shakily pulled it off until the entire vehicle was exposed, revealing a severely damaged yet gleaming yellow car.

Hazy flashes of memories suddenly flooded into his eyesight like a foggy dream. 

**Fatal crash leads to death of passenger, Driver in critical condition** .

There was a noise behind him; the pausing of footsteps that had been running. 

"Tyler."

"This was it." The vehicle was the brightest shade of yellow that Tyler had ever seen. It almost masked its disfigured metal face, but it still didn't distract the human eye from staring at its imperfection. "This was the car." 

He didn't need to turn around to know Josh was standing paralyzed behind him, his faint breaths barely ruffling the feathers of Tyler's withered wings.

"Josh. We were never married." The world was fading into a blur as a sudden realization hit him over his head, contradicting everything he thought he knew, penetrating into the back of his mind; the very crevice of his ignorant and fragile brain. He turned to Josh. "You were the taxi cab man."

  
  


_ 2012: _

_ Darkness fell upon the streets Josh drove that night, his path lightened only by the greens and oranges of lampposts reflecting off of passing cars. He worked the night shift almost every day for the last year at Guitar Center, trying to drum at gigs whenever or wherever so he could be noticed by a local band and somehow become successful. He joined a band called House of Heroes after he met some guy at a party who said they were in need of a new drummer, and Josh was just the man to take the opportunity. _

_ He never understood why he wanted a yellow car. He bought it cheap, and never got around to fork out the money to get it repainted. It was an all too common thing to have random people accidentally stumble into his vehicle during heavy traffic downtown, watching their horrified faces in the backseat mirror at their mistake of thinking his car was a taxi. Josh thought it was hilarious. _

_ Well, until he met Tyler. Then Josh thought it was just sad.  _

_ Tyler had been struggling, that was for sure. _

_ For several nights on his drive home from work when the traffic slowed to a halt, an intoxicated young man with a ukulele would open his car door and stumble inside, thinking the car was a taxi. On the first night, Josh was petrified and almost shouted at the man to leave, but something held him back. From then on, Tyler would flag him down from the curb, they would talk, and Josh would drive him home for no charge. He never had a proper chance to tell him he wasn't in the Yellow Cab business, or the heart to wake him up and tell him to get the fuck out. _

_ No. Josh would drive him home just once.  _

_ Or one more night. _

_ And maybe once more. _

_ Okay. This became a regular thing. _

_ After countless drives home, Josh became familiar with the route to Tyler's house that the crestfallen boy no longer needed to tell him directions. Small talks were also made on nights Tyler wasn't as drunk or tired that Josh came to understand he performed shows in places downtown every so often, coincidentally coming out from the bar at the exact same time each night when Josh was stuck in traffic. He had a band, but he described his energy didn't mix well with his bandmates which made it more stressful for him to keep the audiences hyped each performance. It left him physically and emotionally exhausted each time, festering negative criticism to damage his already weakened psyche. _

_ "I'm a mess." Tyler said some nights. "Nobody came tonight." He would say on others.  _

_ This was Josh's chance. At last, he found an opportunity to help himself, while also helping someone else. It was perfect. _

_ And the night he told Tyler, "I play drums. I could help you out if you'd like." changed the course of their lives completely, for better or for worse. Tyler's eyes luminously reflected the lights from the street lamps at Josh's offer, but both men were oblivious to what lay ahead of them. _

_ Tyler invited him into his house that night to stay up late, just talking. Soon, Josh officially met him when he was sober. The real Tyler; A singer that could also play the uke and piano and was on the verge of losing his last burned-out bandmate and become a one-man band. He claimed that the shows were thinning each night, and despite Tyler's energetic attempts to hold onto the precious thing that seemed to be draining from his fingertips, it wasn't enough. He spoke as if he was arguing with himself to dismantle the band. He also told Josh he always found himself going for drinks afterwards, and that's when he started taking rides from him.  _

_ On the couch, tangling their legs together lazily, they talked for hours about their dreams and how Tyler would offer Josh a spot as his permanent drummer as soon as his current one finally decided to leave his band, twenty one pilots. _

_ Josh found the name so odd, until Tyler explained to him that it was from a play he read back in high school, and then it seemed so incredibly unique which perfectly matched Tyler's beautifully strange mind with all its simple complexity.  _

_ For several days, it became a normal thing for Josh to visit Tyler. Tyler himself looked to be getting so much better and happier, especially when Josh decided to bring his drum set along and play for him like he was auditioning, even though Tyler already guaranteed him a spot as his drummer when the time was right.  _

_ Josh assumed that that must have been the night he fell in love with Tyler, and maybe even the other way around. When he played the drums for him, Tyler's gaze seemed to spark and the pull between them strengthened when they locked eyes. It then occurred to him how much more lovely Tyler appeared when he wasn't hidden by the shadows of the backseat of his car. He was absolutely gorgeous, and his spirit was all the more angelic.  _

_ "You're going to be my husband one day, Ty." Josh was always glad he said that after Tyler had gone on for several minutes ranting about completely adorable things and dreams and compliments to Josh one warm afternoon. It was meant to be a joke about their close friendship, but after Josh had spoken it, he came to realize that he actually wanted it.  _

_ Tyler laughed and ruffled Josh's natural brown wavy hair. "No I won't, dude. But that's a sweet-as-heck thought." _

_ "Yes you will!" _

_ Tyler leaned back into the couch and continued to smile widely in blissful content, nonchalantly resting his arms behind his head. "Will I though?" _

_ "Yes! And as soon as I join the band, we'll play all around the world together, with you singing and me drumming right beside you." _

_ "Slow down Josh!" Tyler flushed pink."You're always going so fast! You always have everything planned out, step for step. It's one of the reasons why I like you."  _

_ It wasn't really a proposal, but rather a goal, but Josh was still determined to reach that goal eventually. Step by step, a little bit at a time, and inches closer each day would lead them further and higher, outstretching their hands to the sky and grasping greatness within their palms. _

_ Josh took the step, and Tyler became the greatness that he was finally able to reach.  _

_ In that moment, their lives intertwined so tightly that their destinies would almost be the same. When they were in each other's presence, there was an unmistaken mixture of so much ambition and understanding, and they delved into their future head first.  _

_ That all happened within a few days, but it felt like years. Decades. Lifetimes.  _

_ But Sunday night arrived all too soon. _

_ Tyler had a show the previous night, and barely anyone showed up. Those that did come never got hyped up until the main band came on. They just stared idly at them like they were watching a movie, phones gripped in their hands but never taking any photos.  _

_ Josh had to work the next night. He prayed that more people would come to Tyler and Nick's show so his friend wouldn't resort to drinking again, but he did. Soon enough, he caught sight of his friend on the curb outside of a small venue called King Bee's, shaking on his legs while outstretching his hands to flag a taxi down. Josh immediately pulled to the curb, heart sinking in worry at the sight outside of his window. Tyler opened the back door and stepped in to mumbling something incoherent. _

_ "More drinking, Tyler?" Josh asked sadly, but all Tyler did was groan miserably. He stared at his friend a moment longer before starting up the car again. "Don't be afraid, Ty. I’m taking you home." _

_ The rest of the drive seemed like just a surreal nightmare as the morning sun was finally peaking over the horizon. They were on the freeway, and Josh felt his eyelids becoming heavier from the lack of sleep as each minute dragged on. He swerved into the next lane until a car horn shocked him out of his trance, causing him to sharply turn the wheel, and another horn was heard before he dodged a second car, crashing into the side railings so quickly he thought his brain jumped out of his skull while his body was suddenly put on pause. He blinked away the darkness to see a battered figure slumped over the dashboard under the shattered windshield. At first, he was so relieved to hear crying because that meant his friend was still okay...until he realized it wasn't Tyler's chocking sobs of pain, but his own. _

  
  


Tyler breathed as the vision faded. 

The two men now stared at each other from across the kitchen table, in silence, for what felt like hours of relentless distress and cold sweats. 

"I'm sorry." Josh finally murmured. "I was the driver."

"You.." Everything was clustering together in Tyler's mind, connecting the dots, assembling the pieces of the puzzle, yet it was still a hazy blur of why's. "You were just my friend. We talked. We were going to be in a band together! I remember! I remember it all!

"I only drove you home and hung out a couple times. Whenever I saw you drunk, I didn't want to just  _ leave _ you there." Josh was holding back tears. "But that night...till this day I still don't remember what happened, but I swerved and then everything was a dream after that."

"Why didn't you tell me?" Tyler already knew the answer though.

They knew each other only for a few days, and within that time Josh fell so much in love with Tyler. Then one Sunday, the drummer had to bear the guilt of being responsible for the loss of his beloved friend. When Tyler returned to Earth, Josh was given a second chance at constructing the love story he always wanted with Tyler. He didn't want to lose the opportunity again. In his mind, it worked out perfectly. In reality though, it was more complicated than writing a piece of fan fiction. 

Still, would it have made any difference in the future if Josh had told him that he wasn't a taxi driver? Would his death still be an inevitable event of the past?

He didn't know for sure, but all this could have been easier to cope with if Josh had just told the truth about their relationship in the beginning. "Why have you been lying?"

"Because I was in love with you." His answer was strained and broken as tears began to fall again from his face. He hauled himself off the kitchen chair and let his body slump to the floor. "Seeing you again did something to me. It was all my fault. I'm so sorry. I never forgave myself. Every day I lived without you I felt like I didn't deserve. I had to live with the guilt of what I did to you. I was drinking that night myself and I knew I shouldn't have picked you up but I couldn't just leave you there. But I should have. I just wanted things to be better. I wanted to start over from the beginning!" His voice cracked through his trembling body. "You died too young, but trust me, you were saved from even greater horrors."

He fell silent, reddened eyes glued to the floor as he waited for Tyler to respond. But when Tyler remained silent too, Josh was visibly growing more distressed. "I only hope that you'll find it inside of you to forgive me. I know saying "sorry" won't fix anything, but I wish it did."

Tyler joined his side, gently touching their shoulders together. "I forgive you, Josh."

Josh tore his gaze from the floor, his sorrowful eyes meeting his friend that had witnessed years of Josh's internal torment and decay show itself within a few days. "You what?" He asked like he didn't hear correctly. 

Tyler's heart tightened in sympathy for his friend. His friend. Josh had been there for him at his worse; when he wasn't capable of even keeping himself safe, and he did this many times over until it was time for him to leave the Earth. "I forgive you for everything."

Josh stared at him with uncertain eyes as if he believed his friend was flat out lying. "I killed you, Tyler."

"We all die for a reason. It was just my time to go. Just think; if I didn't die that night, something worse might have happened to other people in the future. Everything is connected."

Josh slumped over and burrowed his head deep in his arms. Tyler reached over and rested a hand on his back. He felt the drummer begin to sob, slowly wracking his entire body. His own throat tightened as tears filled his eyes as he looked down at Josh so broken from his attempts to fix everything out of his love for Tyler; all their dreams, their past, their future together. But all that shattered like his yellow car's windshield. 

"I forgive you, Josh." Tyler rasped, tugging him slowly into a hug in which Josh instantly latched onto him like a child. "I forgive you. I forgive you. I forgive you. Everything is okay." 

Josh continued to tremble, "Can you stay then? Will you stay with me?"

Tyler wanted to choke out and start sobbing just like Josh. Things would never go back to normal again, no matter how much he wished it could. "I don't belong here anymore, Josh. I need to return home."

"Then I can go with you!"

Tyler shook his head. "No Josh."

Josh fell silent again, face wet with tears and creased from grief. "You really are gone, aren't you?"

Tyler didn’t respond.

The two sat huddled together in silence in the darkening room of the late afternoon. As the minutes passed, Josh's breathing eventually steadied. The sounds of the world faded as they gradually drifted off into the safe haven of sleep.

◽ ◽ ◽

There was a sound of engine starting. 

Tyler awoke with a flinch and only to realize Josh was no longer slumped beside him. 

"Josh...?" There was no answer. "Josh!" Tyler shouted, but his voice only echoed throughout the empty house. Heart pounding, he drowsily scrambled off the floor and stumbled to the windowsill in time to see Josh's unmistakable damaged yellow car pulling out of the garage and drive out of the apartment complex and down the road. 

Tyler stood there for several moments in aching horror. Without a second thought, he kicked out the screen of the window and jumped, falling down for a few moments before his wings caught the air and he thrust himself into the sky of the setting sun. 

The people he flew over in the streets were once again almost the size of ants living out their normal human lives. All of them craned their heads up to the clouds to see Tyler fly across, pointing and shouting with awe at the man gliding in the sky, some even snapping pictures that will capture no man. Just an empty expanse of clouds. He needed to find Josh before it was too late for the both of them.

But no matter how much Tyler searched around the city, even after following the road Josh had taken, he had only spotted a few school buses and a Penske truck. The minutes dragged on before he finally heard a siren erupting from a distance; it was an ambulance racing down the freeway, swerving between cars who instantly pulled aside to let it pass. 

His heart nearly jumped through his ribcage. If it did, that's what he was following now, bracing himself for what he already knew happened down the road where cars clustered to a halt. Debris was scattered over dozens of yards under fire trucks and the ambulance that just jolted to park nearby. Police officers directed the flow of traffic while EMTs desperately circulated the scene.

Tyler let his wings buckle into his back, forcing him to drop to the road and stumble into a run towards the source of havoc. A police officer quickly stepped in front of him and Tyler crashed heavily into him. "Sir, I need you to leave. Please get back into your vehicle where it's safe."

"Please." Tears were beading around his eyes as he tried to peer around the trucks and emergency paramedics to see anything yellow. The officer forced him back several steps and Tyler retaliated by grabbing the man's wrists, desperately trying to shove past him. Stronger, the man grabbed Tyler's arms to control him, but Tyler was now a frantic mess. "Please! That's my friend!"

The officer loosened his grip, "You knew the driver?"

"What happened to him? Please!"

The officer hesitated. "The driver crashed into the northbound railings. Paramedics are doing what they can, but it doesn't look good."

The wreckage was now visible through the cluster of paramedics and firefighters. A car had collided head-on into the protective side railings and was now a mangled piece of metal debris. It was a yellow shell of a vehicle that had witnessed a second, more gruesome death. 

That was enough to make Tyler stop. It was over. He was too late. And now Josh was gone. There was nothing he had told Josh that comforted the drummer for his mistakes, nor that Tyler offered his forgiveness and insisted there was no need to feel any guilt. It had just become Josh's time to escape.

Tyler let himself drop to the ground on weak legs. His body was failing him before he knew it and his wings progressively decaying with every second that passed. Feathers fell around his legs, yet he craned his head up to sky, glimpsing at the strange cluster of clouds that had suddenly appeared. The sun escaped from them to beat down warmly onto his face, drying his tears. 

"Please, don't forget about me." He murmured.

When the sun became too bright to bear, he lowered his head and cracked open his eyes. Not far from the crash, a pale entity stood. Tyler then smiled with all the grief and love and joy that he still held within his body at the sight. 

Josh's body. 

Josh's car.

The beautifully plain taxi cab.

  
  


◽ ◽ ◽

  
  


"I was hoping you hadn't left without me."

"I wouldn't have left you."

"So, what do you think of the clouds now that I'm here?"

"They're bearable."

"Admit it. You love them. And my company."

"I never said I didn't."

"So it's true?"

"Of course it's true, dude."

Josh nuzzled up in the crook of Tyler's neck. The two sat on a small cloud overlooking the sunset above their old neighborhood where their families lovingly mingled for their annual BBQ. It had been too long since Josh and Tyler's departure for them to feel solumn anymore, but rather share a sense of togetherness that was stronger than their families had ever been before. 

The brisk wind was hitting them and suddenly knocked Tyler's red beanie off his head once again. Josh was quick enough to snatch it and hand back to him. Tyler smiled, and instead reached over to tug off Josh's hat and slip it on his head.

Josh grinned at his companion as he put on Tyler's most beloved beanie. "I love the clouds." 

They smiled sweetly at each other and admired how lovely the other looked in their beloved items of color. Yellow and red were now Tyler's two favorite colors in the whole wide world. After all, the drummer was the one who wore them.

In this world, angels appeared in people's lives to act as a bridge between humans and their death day; to guide them when it was their time to depart. In other times, they simply wished to reunite with those who reminded them of their old lives on Earth, who made things better, and who had given them hope.

Though Josh had never been a taxi cab driver, Tyler had forgiven him and the many flaws humans make in their lifetime. But that's all they once were: diseased humans that flaw so flawlessly until their dying days, cracking open their caskets to the skies and reaching their arms to the angels in a pink tinted place where there was no more fear, no more lies, no more sadness. 

Tyler leaned over to touch their foreheads together, breathing in the sweetness of Josh's rosy vanilla skin. 

Sometimes we die as utterly miserable and beaten down souls. But other times, we will fly away so freely where all we did will be undone. So true, and so undyingly pure once again. 

"I love the clouds too, Josh dear."

  
  


**Author's Note:**

> TTCM is now available as a book! Visit my Instagram @rainbowhoodlum or Tumblr @rainbowhoodlumart for more info!


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